Today is a special day, one where we are reminded of those that cared for us, loved us, and made sacrifices beyond our belief. A parents love for their child goes above and beyond, surpassing the universe and all that it holds. In honour of Parents’ Day, I want to express my gratitude to all the amazing mothers and fathers out there. This is for the single parents and guardians who strived in the presence of parenthood. Thank you for showing strength, resilience, and patience in your steps.
I want to share an extraordinary story with you all today, a story about my amazing mother. A single mother that raised nine crazy children (a whole football team if you ask me), a woman who left her homeland (Afghanistan) just to give us a better sense of living and a mother who hid her tears, just so her children wouldn’t feel the same pain she felt at that moment.
A Mother’s Tears 💔
We used to live in a little house in West London. It’s hard to forget how cold the atmosphere used to be in that house. Nine children and two rooms between us all, it was a nightmare, a struggle I still remember till this day as the horrible memories replay like a broken record. Often you find comfort, even in the worst of places, but sadly for my family and me, all that was given to us in that house were terrible moments.
I was only aged 7 at the time, I would see my mother cry often- not understanding the extent of her pain at the time. Yet every time tears would flow down her eyes, she would gaze at me lovingly and remind me that “Everything is going to be okay.” One night, I walked into my parent’s bedroom, and I vividly remember my father holding onto her neck and choking her, my brother then ran into the room- forcing him off of her. It became a regular occurrence, the house was often noisy, and I would always find myself crawled up into a ball in the corner of a room crying, wishing for my father to leave.
Abusing my mother became nature for my father, whether it was verbal or physical, he wouldn’t stop. My mother’s tears flowed like a river for years on end, until one day it was put to an end. A day where seeing my father leave became a day of celebratory goodness.
The Hardships 🙏
It was 2011, we finally moved into a new home, a place we could finally call home. My father would often fly back and forth from Afghanistan, and I would pray endlessly for him to never return. One day he did return, now taking over our home, and creating a cold and familiar space for us all. The shouting would start again, and my sister and I would look to each other for comfort crying hopelessly, yet my mother remained stronger than ever before. She would pray, day in and day out, finding a sense of relief from the pain she faced.
Every day after school, to avoid my father I would go to the local park by my home with my mother, we would play badminton (although we were both just as bad as each other at the sport) it became a way for us to kill time and stay outside of the house for as long as we could. Nightfall would eventually come, and we had to make out way back home, another night, another act of violence against my mother.
An End To An Endless Pain 📿
It was a long road and a heavy one, especially for my mother. The day finally came where my brothers stood up, after all that fear and built up anger, they came together and told my father to leave. It wasn’t as easy as it seems, I remember the shouting, the loud thump of my brother’s fist hitting the wall, the sound of my mother screaming and the rhythm of my broken heartbeat as I gasped for breath.
A police report was finally filed against him, but before anything else could happen or even move forward with that report- he had fled back to Afghanistan. The police report was filed too late, but we felt relieved because he was no longer in the home that my mother built, in the house that became a home because of the tears and love she gave her children. The sacrifices she made and the battles she silently faced, she became my hero.
Find Your Peace ♥️
I chose to share this story with you all, as a sign of appreciation for all the parents who have suffered silently and have somehow broken down the walls that closed them off from the world. Parenthood is never a comfortable journey, especially if it’s one where you are doing it on your own, but even still- remember that you are NEVER alone.
Seek out help when needed; find comfort in places you have never been to before, reach out to family and friends, but most importantly, never forget to put your state of mind first. I say this because my mother was once afraid to speak up, she felt lost in a community that didn’t offer her help or guidance. However, she soon found the courage to put herself first and ignore what the Afghan community had to say about her.
We live in a bitter-sweet world, one in which we must learn to progress beautifully and flourish. Parents day is a special day, so remember to cherish those in your life that have raised you, guided you, and helped you through your happiest and/or darkest moments.
As a woman, a daughter, and a sister, I often remind myself of the difficulties that life brought onto my mother’s doorstep, so I never forget to keep pushing in my darkest moments- for her sake and for mine. Our parents should be our motivators, so allow yourself to grow remarkably with the stories they hold and the future stories you wish to create.
Shining a loving light on parents all over the world. Thank you for being you and for raising the children of the next generation and the generations to come.
Dear parents, you are all a blessing on this earth.
💕💕💕Happy Parents Day! 💕💕💕
The website below offers a list of organisations that supports parents: https://www.careforthefamily.org.uk/family-life/parent-support/parent-support-organisations
National Domestic Violence Hotline: https://www.thehotline.org/